Seven months ago I stumbled on something that was spreading through the blogosphere called, "What I Like About Me". And I wrote a post for it.
When I look at that post today, I think it kinda sucks. I mean, I used categories, was all matter-of-fact about it. But perhaps that's how I needed to do it - then.
I feel so much different now than I did then. In just 7 short months I feel like so much about myself has changed. The things I listed then still apply, but what I want to list now, are totally different things.
Actually, now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure I have been experiencing these changes in me since I came away from the night of Mark's bypass surgery with PTSD. That was September 21, 2010.
When @finallyMom put out a request for year-end posts about what we learned in 2011 and want to carry with us into 2012, I wrote something for her and, with encouragement from @AdotheMomalog, came up with my very own hashtag: #ShedtheCrap.
So what I like about me now is:
1. I am open to the possibilities. What possibilities? Any! Whatever might come my way.
2. I am shedding the crap I have felt my entire life. I seem to finally be
3. So many of the insecurities I've had for AGES are much less of a concern now. I feel considerably more secure in my friendships, for example.
4. I have some wisdom. I have been through a lot, dammit, and I have the scars to prove it! But what I've gained as well, is wisdom.
5. I can confidently say #4 because I LEARN from my experiences. Whether positive or negative, I learn something from every little thing. From interactions in my marriage to parenting to friends & family and blogging too.
6. Speaking of confidence, I have more of it. "Jennifer" and "confident" in the same sentence wasn't something I ever used to say. Again, I think time and experience, as well as blogging, are what are helping these changes come about.
7. I love to laugh and look for the humor in everything. And you really can find it almost everywhere. Even in a hospital worrying about your husband. Even in the middle of sobbing, the tears can turn to laughter on a dime. Shit happens, and a lot of it is funny!
8. I put on my big girl panties every day. I'm not a whiner and don't feel sorry for myself. I don't say "I can't handle this". I might say I don't want to handle it, but I can. And I will. I'm too stubborn not to.
9. I've learned how to state my opinions with tact. Mostly. I think.
10. I'm pretty proud of the kind of mom I am. I am NOT perfect. Neither are my kids. But I know them and love them fiercely. Their needs come before mine, I try to teach them the lessons they need to learn and I make them take baths and brush their teeth.
11. I'm not as uptight as I used to be! I can be spontaneous, I'm not as controlling and I can let things go.
12. (Still not letting go of the even number thing though.) I'm not as shy as I once was. I can more easily talk to strangers and actually come up with interesting things to say in social situations.
Can I do a happy dance now? This took me like 3 days to write!
|ALL of these are me, from the little girl squinting in the sun, to the center, most recent.|
Daughter, cousin, girl, young lady, woman, wife, mother, friend.
Jennifer, Jenni, Jen, Sweetie, Mommy